Sunday, August 14, 2011

Questions Couples Should Ask

Since writing my blogs for fathers, in which I provided questions they can ask a future son-in-law or daughter-in-law, I thought it might also be helpful to provide some questions a couple should answer before ever getting engaged. These questions make sure a couple covers all necessary bases before committing to marriage. If the couple doesn’t have these answered before engagement, then certainly they should have them answered before saying, “I Do.”

1. Are you saved? Do you have a personal relationship with Christ?
2. How are you growing in your relationship with God?
3. What helps you to grow in your relationship with Christ?
4. What do you believe your life calling is?
5. Do you desire to pray with your spouse?
6. Do you read the Bible regularly? Do you enjoy time in God’s Word?
7. What type of church do you attend/want to attend?
8. What do I do that encourages you the most in your relationship with God?
9. What is your understanding of the roles of the husband and wife in marriage?
10. How do you envision your marriage glorifying God?
11. What is your philosophy of parenting?
12. What type of budget do you live on? Talk to me about your standard of living and/or your anticipated standard of living once married?
13. Are you in debt? If so, how much?
14. Do you tithe? Do you think a Christian should tithe?
15. What was your relationship like with your parents growing up, and now?
16. What are some of the most painful things you went through as a child?
17. What is something difficult you have been through and how have you grown through it?
18. Do you have any painful things in your past that you have not been healed of?
19. What have your previous dating relationships been like?
20. What do anticipate being your top three needs in marriage?
21. How are you willing to sacrifice in your marriage?
22. How do you anticipate your spouse sacrificing for you?
23. How do you anticipate responding if your spouse is not meeting your needs and things are not going well?
24. Are you willing to get counseling in your marriage if it needs help or is not going very good?
25. Once children come, how do you want things to be in the family in terms of the mother staying home, working, etc.?
26. What do you like to do for vacations?
27. Where do you anticipate spending holidays once you are married?
28. Do you take any medication and if so, for what?
29. How often are you moody or depressed, and how might your spouse be sensitive to that in the marriage?
30. What are the most important qualities for your spouse to possess?
31. What do you like to do for fun when you have free time?
32. Are you a virgin? If not, have you repented of that sin(s)?
33. Are you willing to take a blood test for STDs?
34. How have you experienced the forgiveness of God in your life?
35. How have you experienced the power of the Holy Spirit in your life?